Marriage

How to Cope with Being Childless

Being childless by choice or due to a physical problem is a situation some couples may face. You want a baby, but due to physical problems you cannot conceive. You have tried consulting doctors but every effort seems to be fruitless.

The urge to have a baby is strong, family pressure and social circumstances may influence you and this could lead to accusations or placing blame on your partner.

Despair further leads to depression and fights.  Resorting to such behavior can cause a lot of stress on your relationship.

How can a couple deal with such a situation?

Go Stress Free:  Very often the man or the woman is under pressure from outside sources to have a baby. Every medication or treatment that you have tried is not successful, such failures can worsen the mental state. If you are going through such a phase, the most important thing you can do is relax. Take a break, go on a vacation. Be stress free, relaxed and enjoy your marriage and your time together as husband and wife.  With less stress in your life, your chances of becoming pregnant increase.

Adoption:  Adopting a child is a wonderful alternative if you are unable to have a child on your own.  Not only are you and your partner gaining a child, you are giving a child a chance to live a normal life. This is a beautiful way of sharing your love with an unfortunate child.  Be prepared.  It can be a long and stressful process, but be patient and you and your new child will soon become a family.

Get Social: If adoption is out of the question, you may want to volunteer at different places such as visiting an orphanage, teaching students who do not have the benefit of studying in a school, sponsoring a child’s education, spending time with your nieces or nephews.  This will help you overcome your pain.

The most important thing you can do to strengthen your relationship is accept each other as you are.  Stop blaming yourself or circumstances for not having a baby. Women tend to be most affected when faced with the problem of being childless. Supporting her with love, care and support will help her deal with the pain. Men on the other hand are silent bearers.  You need to understand this.  You may need to seek professional counseling to deal with the loss and to voice your feelings.  Just remember to include your spouse so he/she will not feel left out.

Remember to enjoy each other.  Build your relationship.  Being together will help you think better and face any problem that may come your way.

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