How To Clear Misunderstandings In A Marriage

Posted on September 15, 2008 in Marriage Advice, Tips for A Husband, Tips for A Wife

If you and your spouse have not been talking to each other for long due to a reason that is “Simply not worth the fight”, a misunderstanding that happened due to various reasons, then efforts should be made to clear out the air.

Many a couple’s break up due to small misunderstandings which when not cleared is equivalent to “Making Mountains out of a molehill”.  There are some couples who avoid talking to each other for long due to this reason and end up breaking their marriage.

Misunderstandings are like small holes in a ship that slowly drown away the relationship. They literally tear the relationship apart. If not dealt immediately they turn into such huge emotional conflicts, which can never be mended despite all the effort.

It is very important that one clear up misunderstandings in a marriage. Here are some tips on this issue.

1) Talk to Your Partner When They Are Most Likely To Listen To You:  If your partner is irritated and angry avoid talking to him/her. Instead talk to them when they are relaxed and are more open to a conversation.

2) Don’t Accuse: When you talk don’t start blaming your spouse about what happened. They are most likely to avoid listening to you. Instead talk about what happened and how you can deal with it without blaming any one.

3) Talk from A Third Person’s Point Of View: When you talk about the situation, separate your self and your spouse and view the problem from an outsiders point of view. This way there are less chances of a blame game and you will resolve the problem faster.

4) Listen: The most important part of the conversation is “Listening”. Listen to what your spouse has to say. Do not interrupt them when they are talking. Good listening is “Half the battle Won”. When your spouse brings out things, they feel relieved and will be more open to listen to you.

5) Apologize: If you are in the wrong, apologize to your spouse and if you feel that your partner is wrong do not force them to apologize. They will if they want to. By forcing them you will worsen the situation.

6) Act Normal: Once you have cleared out the misunderstanding, act normal and behave the same. Do not make attempts of making your spouse feel guilty.

Keeping these steps in mind will help you save your relationship. Once done you will feel it was worth the effort. You may feel that this act may lower your self-esteem and may hurt your ego, but don’t give in to such thoughts. Initiating such a conversation will not only cause your self-respect to increase but will also cause our spouse to respect you.

Not just in a marital relationship, if misunderstanding is eating away into any of your close relationships, make an effort to clear it off immediately.

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