Retired Husband Syndrome

Origin of RHS
RHS, otherwise known as Retired Husband Syndrome, was first recognized as a full-fledged disease in Japan. This was done by Nobuo Kurokawa, an RHS expert who invented the term in the year 1991. In a presentation to the Japanese Society of Psychosomatic Medicine, Kurokawa explained the reason.

According to Kurokawa, women in Japan were facing serious mental (stress) problems which often manifested itself in physical problems like ulcers and stomach pain. This has eventually resulted in disturbed relationships and the solution to it seems hard to be found.

Though recognized only in Japan, it might be a reality in other countries as well. So, why not discuss the problem and try solving the same.

Understanding the Nature of the Problem:

His Job
The first step is to understand the nature of job that your husband had been used to. This will help you understand the way he expects things to be at home or the way he behaves at home. If he had been bossy at office, he won’t leave this habit very soon. You can try explaining to him, that things ARE different at home, that things work out DIFFERENTLY at home, and his wife is not the office boy!

His Atmosphere
As he tends to loose the usual atmosphere around the house, he tends to become irritable. Having spent the majority of his life in the atmosphere of his office, he finds it difficult to see too much liberty around. He might also have to develop his relationships at home altogether. And in all this you are the one on whom, he depends.

This does not at all mean that you are the one who should adjust, but the understanding needs to be mutual. Bring love back into your life by thinking about the early days of marriage when both of you craved to be with each other.

Keep Him Engaged
Another way to avoid unpleasantness at home is to keep him engaged with different things. Ask him to help you with cooking, or cleaning the house. Going out for shopping together can be great fun too. If possible, get him involved with volunteer work, or talk to him about resuming his hobbies once again thus, reviving his memories of younger days.

Lastly, befriend him once again as you had done earlier and experience the joy yet again.